On Growing Old

I thought it would take a lot longer

Photo by Keith Tanner on Unsplash

As someone who doesn’t know a lot about anything, but does know a little about a lot of things, I am constantly inspired by the brilliance of other writers on this platform. One of today’s posts that touches on a subject I’ve addressed before is this one by Charles Hugh Smith.

The Impossible Dream: 70 Million Boomers Retire in Style

As I’ve mentioned many times, one of the greatest fears of those of us who have attainted the title of elderly, is reaching the point where we can no longer live on our own in our own home. There are two aspects to this. Going into assisted living, care, old age home, or whatever you want to call it, means surrendering much of your freedom. Your life is no longer controlled by you, but by those who are caring for you. As Charles points out, the costs of this type of care are astronomical, and beyond the means of anyone who is not already quite wealthy.

Secondly is the impact your incapacity to care for yourself has on your loved ones. If professional care is not financially viable, the choice may be to care for the patient in a home shared with the caregiver. In some cultures this is the norm. As parents age, they live in the homes of their children. As long as health is not a concern, this arrangement can be beneficial. Elder parents can help care for their grandchildren, as well as handling other daily tasks. That can work, but only if the elder parents are in good health. It’s much more difficult when there are no children, and one member of a marriage is faced with caring for the other. That puts an enormous burden on the caregiver, which often leads to the destruction of their own health.

The generation that created the Baby Boom, following the conclusion of World War II, was the first to confront this problem. Previous generations either died younger, or were mostly healthy until they passed. Advances in medicine led to people living much longer, which as Charles points out, led to people having to care for parents while also being in retirement.

One set of my grandparents were able to live independently almost to the end, but the other could not. Neither they, nor my parents, had the means to pay for the long term care that would be required. This was quite common for that generation. The usual tactic was to take control of the finances of the person needing care and “spending down” to get them to the brink of bankruptcy. At that point Medicaid could pick up the tab for care, though it would only cover basic needs in a state-supported institution. My grandmother never forgave my father for putting her in what she called a “hellhole”, but he had no other choice.

When my mother succumbed to Alzheimer’s, my father did like many and tried to care for her himself. Eventually my sister found a facility that they could afford, but that is relatively rare. Long term care establishments are very expensive, and often are understaffed. Changing the diapers on an adult is not the kind of work anyone wants, and it’s hard to maintain a staff of caring individuals.

My wife and I, now in our late 70s, no longer have living parents. We are in good health, and doing our best to maintain it. Our three sons are still a ways away from retirement age. We’ve done the legal paperwork to make it easier on them when our time comes, but we still have concerns. Like everyone we want to remain in our home until our last day. But we are also determined not to be a burden on the three families that we love so much. I think that sums up the attitude of most of our fellow Boomers.

To achieve this goal we have become obsessive about maintaining our health. In previous posts I’ve pointed out that most of the problems of old age are actually metabolic diseases that can be avoided. Diabetes, heart disease, cancer, Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s are all common to older people, and the age at onset is getting lower. The second post I read today addresses one of the reasons.

The Treatment Makes the Disease

This post makes the point that the word cure is no longer mentioned in modern medicine. Diseases are managed. Never mind that there is solid evidence that type 2 diabetes can be reversed, and even cancer can be put into remission by adopting a low carbohydrate, high fat diet. There is no money in that. Treating symptoms, rather than root causes, creates a self-perpetuating cycle that makes the big pharmaceutical companies enormously profitable. Feeding this cycle (in this case literally) are the big food companies. A surprisingly small number of corporations make almost everything you see in your local supermarket. Many of them are owned in whole, or part, by tobacco companies. After all, food is a basic requirement of life, so it’s much easier to sell than cigarettes.

Health care is also a popular topic for presidential candidates, and this year is no different. The proposed solutions are always related to improving insurance, but no one ever addresses the simpler and cheaper option of improving our food and addressing the problems that are caused by food. If you are approaching retirement you need to read Charles’ post. If you are taking any prescription drugs you should read the Remnant MD post. Preparing for retirement means much more than having a nest egg. Invest in your health now so you don’t have to spend your golden years with metabolic disease. The resources you’ll need to do that are at the end of this post: